Let me lose my memory ;
When i lose my memories , I do not have to think of you at all .


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20110520

" I wish i could go back to my childhood times , i want my happy back ! '

Parent , relatives , grandmother , grandfather always talked about their childhood times . it was great , having childhood during kampong times , where you can run all over the place and you can go to your friend's house easily .. cause they are staying right beside you . and mum's always shout across the road to ask you come back just for lunch .. how great would it be ? leaving happily in the kampong which you don't have to think of anything and just play ? hah , i wish i'm those one of them staying in kampong . kampong life isn't that great , i can say . they don't have lots of thing , they ain't clean , and they have dogs , cats with their poo all over the place . unlike city , is clean and you can have your things just beside you . but kampong life's are simple isn't it ? the only thing that they would worried is about money and that's all ? for those who ain't rich ofcourse that's the only thing they worried . i lived in city when i was born till now , i didn't regret living in city . living in city isn't something bad , it was quite fun too . remember i iwas still small , i was staying in amk with my popo . it just feels great . my popo would give everything i want to me , and ofcourse with my sister too . although i don't quite remember what's going on when i was born all that , but i do remember everything at the age three or four . i know that my memory isn't that good . at the age three or four , my dad always bring us to meet his brother . my dad's brother are good , i can say that . my dad's brother bring me go fly kite . and every week on that time , we always go to east coast . he brought those bubble which you can blow want for me and my sister . while they are talking , me and my sister are playing the bubbles .. kite that time , i'm not sure we went to what place . we brought kite first , after that one person take kite and run , another person running behind . and when the kite fly up high , you feel happy ! after all those , we went to eat bbq ! and lots of thing happening . all those is when i was in the age from 3-6 . after those fun , primary school life started . in the beginning , i first went to xishan primary school , i doesn't have an special feelings . i just sat in the hall quietly . after that , my form teacher ; ms lim brought us back to class . my mum walk behind my class . and there's a malay guy , whom is very fat , kept crying and crying . Omg ! heng i'm not the type . primary 1 life jiu like this started . primary school i ain't that obedient , the first year in primary school while teacher was teaching i was running around the class , playing with lots of people . the form teacher ; ms lim was old . when she said there was sweet and chocolate , i was the first to sit down and listen to the teacher one whole day just to get one sweets / chocolate from her . Hah . but there's one time , she was chasing my class guy , and she fall . i was shocked ! Dm came to our class and scold ask that time . from pri 1-4 i'm always the same , not obedient , and always being dis-respectful to teachers . until primary 5 , there a teacher which damn good to us ! she's always the one who always caring to us . when there's always her lesson , we kept playing , talking , throwing paper planes and putting stapler bullet on chairs . and girls , i'm the one who always being catch . haha . i'm always the one who get punished by her , and i'm the one who always stand outside .. but until now , i still kinda regret because she was really good ! Primary six , what i should say leh .. OH ! martha choo ! she's was the annoying teacher in primary school . and she always do her make-up until like those opera singer that type ! gosh ! and she doesn't admit that she's old . lmao ! everyone always tries to make fun of her name . haha ! then we have our festival dance during primary six , and graduation day came ! ); . i miss si da tian wang ! i miss those times we had on primary 5 .. ): . haha ! i've had a great primary school lifes isn't it ? yours would be more great than me , i believe . then i shall not say about secondary school life , since it isn't that great . and secondary school life's simply sucks . i dislike it . . Fml .


20110517

Yes . as you can see , my dad came back already . so i'm updating . exam had just finish , and i can say that i've done it badly . i seems not be be concentrating when exams are coming .. and i don't even know why . and now this fews day in school are like doing nothing . and today is a vesak day , which we don't need to go school . tmr a normal school lesson will start . but i dunno what to bring .. in the past , maybe not the past , is the beginning , i always said that i would study hard , would focus on each and everything . but till now i couldn't do it . my mind couldn't focus on books . i'm trying to read story books to buck up my English , but story book words are way too chim . and some i don't even know how to pronounce it . Grr . and i don't know how to study anymore . my class are simply like an slacking and an playing ground . doesn't treat everything seriously , everything will be treat as a joke . that what's my class do everyday . but they are cute in terms that they always cheer each other up . just like one big family . they do qurrals , do fight . but they still get along with each other well . well , how about me ? i just sit there and laugh along with them . haha ! there's a thing that i dislike when blogging . i always run out of words . i don't know what to write le . now i need to do a delication to Choiyee Ng !

Choiyee ; sec 1 till now , what to say about you leh ? you are always the cutest in our group , no matter what you do always make the group laugh . it's been two year five months since we are friends till now ! and i thanks god for letting me know you . this years when you went out , you never fail to call me out too . and have fun with you all . no matter is go where , you will always never forget to call me .. and i'm happy that you always never forget me . although in school , you are like keep calling me pig and do stupid action , but then i know you're joking . you'll always know your limit of making me . haha . andnow i should say sorry to you . you will know which matter that i'm talking about . if sometimes i will forget you , doesn't concern you that much , i'm sorry . don't angry le , kay ? plus don't always shag alright ? sometimes you seems so shag .. D: [ Shh , don't tell others what we talking about ]

And the whole group , as you all can see . i've already change this year completely . in those past years , i ain't that silvia that you all known . i don't really throw temper at you all in the past , and i will always let you all . but now i sometimes throw at temper at you all , then sometimes don't let you all have your ways . i'm sorry kay ? and sometimes i'm not that concern to you all , i know .. but i'll always know what's you all thinking . maybe not all , but some . hahaha ! and i'm happy to know you all that well , which i don't even know . 11 ' i've know where's my limit and where i stand . through you all , i could learn , maybe not that much but some . haha , and now i'm happy for the situation . after tons and tons of qurrals and 3 break friendship [ which cause by me ] . i hope our group will have a better friendship .. kay ? <3

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"Dreams are always crushing when they don't come true. But it's the simple dreams that are often the most painful because they seem so personal, so reasonable, so attainable. You're always close enough to touch, but never quite close enough to hold and it's enough to break your heart."